Here's a puzzler for you.
What is this on the leaf above?
While you're pondering that, I'm going to rant a little about the Discovery Channel. Remember when it had factual documentary kind of stuff?
You really have to pick and choose to find REAL stuff on it anymore. I know they're playing the ratings game, but gee whiz!
Actually this rant is specific to two shows they are running : Survivor Man (Les Stroud) and
Man vs. Wild (Bear Grylls).
Survivor Man is actually on the Science Channel, but it's a Discovery product.
If I were in a survival situation in the wild, I'd lose these two guys as soon as I could.
Both of them share survival tips that are either just plain stupid or outright bad advice. I realize they have to throw some drama in the show and I should just get over it, but they ARE supposed to be teaching viewers how to survive if lost in the wilderness.
Not all their advice is bad, but every show seems to have at least one ridiculous or needlessly dangerous survival technique.
A while back, Survivor Man was in a Georgia cypress swamp and he covered himself in mud to prevent insect bites. If you do this, you are just going to be dirty and itchy from the bites you are still going to get. Why be a little miserable from mosquito bites when you can be filthy, gritty miserable in your mud coat. There's itchy things in southern swamp mud too and it will not stop mosquitoes.
In another episode, he's on the shore of a tropical region, maybe Costa Rica, and he leaves the breezy shoreline to enter the tropical forest. An ocean shoreline is a veritable grocery of food possibilities, but he leaves it for the forest. Predictably, he spends a long night getting stung and bit by just about every insect in the jungle. Later, he follows a stream back to the beach ... duh!
Stay on the beach you idiot.
Then there's Bear of Man vs. Wild.
He did one show about being stranded on a deserted tropical island. He's doing okay, scrounging things on the pretty lush island, when he decides to build a flimsy raft of logs and set out onto the open ocean in it! Not a quiet estuary or stream, but the open ocean!
He leaves a decent island for the blue desert.
This is survival advice??
On another episode, after some decent advice, he does it again. This time it's a vertical waterfall that he feels would take too long to hike around, so he climbs down it using some wispy vines that happen to grow up the face of the falls.
If you were in a survival situation, would you needlessly risk broken bones to avoid a hike around a vertical waterfall?
You know what a broken bone does to your chances of surviving?
Then, tonight, he's lost in the Rockies. Again, he gives some good advice, but then he comes to a river and instead of hiking along it to civilization, he decides to swim into the 40-ish degree (he said!) water and run the substantial rapids using only his daypack to fend off rocks.
So, to save time, he risks hypothermia and breaking bones, instead of walking the shoreline.
Okay, get ready ...
Arrrrghh, he's actually doing it right now as I type. He's in the mountains of the American west and comes to a 300 foot cliff. Does he hike around it? Noooooo, that would cost him a "couple of hours" so he freeclimbs down the cliff. This is after scrambling down a scree slope of loose talus.
After the cliff, he built a log raft and launched it into the rapids of a river where he again risks broken bones and hypothermia.
Can you say it?
What's more ridiculous is... I watch his show.
This concludes my rant. I'm going to bed.