Thursday, July 17, 2008

The Venus Dog Trap

It began innocently enough.

I was working on the living room remodeling project (instead of blogging) like I am supposed to do. My work area is outside on the porch, and I was making lots of trips back and forth from the living room to the power miter saw, fine tuning cuts ... a shave here, a nibble there.

Flounder was supervising in his usual fashion.

Things were going pretty smoothly, ... which is a lie of course. I was framing windows with trim, cutting mitered returns, and coping moulding endings.

There is no "going smoothly" in finish carpentry.
There is angst.
There is frustration.
There is great potential for enhancing your ability to swear, but there is definitely no "going smoothly".
I'm pretty sure of that.

It was just me and the dogs, which is a good thing, because the last thing you want when you are cutting the mitered return end piece for the tenth time because the other little pieces split or didn't fit is "over the shoulder advice or commentary".

Bear (aka Time Bandit), called a halt to the work by prancing up with a chew toy and a "come play with me" look, so off we went for a little toy tossing and running around. Good ol'Flounder decided he would take a break from supervising and joined us.

The free ranging banties caught their combined attention and both dogs gave chase sending the flyers into the trees, but Hoot the nonflying rooster in the group headed for the grapevine thicket.
That's SOP for Hoot. The thicket is ... well, a thicket. Hoot knows he can lose the dogs there.

Bear plunged in, and emerged Hootless, but soon spotted Gwahir atop the chicken tractor and off he went.

Unfortunately for Flounder, not only had Hoot given him the slip, but the poor dog passed too close to the Venus Dogtrap Vine and was soon ensnared. It was touch and go for a few seconds as the hungry vine held fast. Eventually, I slipped in to assist.

You can click on that link above to go watch the video. I thought adding a video this way would speed page loading... hope it works.
(Sorry about the grunts at the end of the video, I was detangling and filming at the same time)
The cackling chorus in the background of the video is mostly due to Bear chasing chickens while the first part of the Venus Dogtrap attack is happening.

After it was over, Flounder retreated to the safety of the porch where there was no danger of vitus bitus.

Bear announced that he was never going off the porch again, and might not even come off the glider bench.

I tried to tell him it's a vine eat dog world out there ...


Anonymous said...

Vitus bitus - That's TOO funny.

Inquiring minds want to you curse, when no one's watching?

Floridacracker said...

Hell yes.

Dani said...

LOL!! I've wondered about that as well.

Juli said...

I'm sure I heard dog cussing while you kept yourself entertained during filming. Nice of you to lend a hand there PF! sheesh!! Also, what are you feeding that pup!!?? He's HUGE! :)

Doug Taron said...

Too funny. And the manic chicken squawking just adds to the appeal. It's what I've always envisioned PFHQ sounding like. I agree with Juli, Bear is ENORMOUS.

Laura said...

Well, I don't curse left and right, but I have been known to let one loose. So I was a little relieved to see that answer from you. LOL

Yesterday I left a comment to Emma about her photos of the wrens, but I can't find it in the comment section. I have noticed that sometimes when I use the Google/Blogger identity instead of "name/url" my comment gets lost. Since it doesn't happen all the time, I'll chalk it up as a fluke.

Anyway, I just wanted her to know how much I enjoyed the photos! She's got a good eye. :)

And there's no smooth going in finish carpentry? Really? ;)

Hang in there! I'll bet it looks great when you're done. Whatever it is you're doing. Crown molding? Entertainment center? Custom dog house?

Freste said...

First off, it is a well known fact that creative verbal expulsions are cathartic and can help to alleviate those times when you're just plain stuck or exhausted. Yeah it's true. For some unknown reason, it never works at all if family is around though. Sounds like the fliers are sharing an expletive with the pups for the chase. Poor pups. But the chickens asked for it. :-)

Anonymous said...

I love that even while tangled, he still looked up at the chickens and thought about giving them chase. What a great ol' guy!

roger said...

isn't it amazing how a room and window that seem to be square and level......aren't actually so? at least you don't have to wrestle a miterbox.

Susan said...

I think Bear will keep his elders in good physical shape as he lures them into puppy adventures.

All your dogs look HAPPY!

kevin said...

I have heard FC curse.

Good luck with the project. I am working on a boat project, a great oppurtunity to improve cursing skills.

Floridacracker said...

Apparently I have successfully perpetrated a squeaky clean persona for FC and you folks fell for it ...bwhaahahahahhaa! Well, not Kevin, but he's known me since first grade so ...

I have tremendous verbal control.

Beneful pupfood. I swear you can watch his mitosis.

That's pretty much what the sound track is like out here when the pup is outside.
We boarded him last weekend and I swear he had doubled in size when we picked him up.

No fair! You two are experts.
I do it once a summer.
What's that whining sound ... oh, it's me. The job is a complete teardown and remake of the living room.
Thanks for the Emma compliment, she is the one kid who really got into photography, beyond snapshots.
(Katie, if you're reading this, you KNOW your camera is full of self-portraits and little else!)

It's tough having those cathartic moments when you teach kids.
It's a wonder teacher's heads don't explode from backed up #@%$#@!!

He is wonderful and 12 1/2 years old. Still has a puppy brain.

true. my big challenge on this room will be doing the mantle since i have yet to finish the plan and the other jobs are coming to a close.

They should be!
I agree that Bear is very good for the older pups. He gets them up and off the porch.

Yeah, and a lot worse.
The Black Sabbath album you asked about a while back isn't a new release of course, just a new copy of We Sold Our Souls For Rock and Roll.
I had been Sabbathless and Skynrdless for awhile and I fixed that recently.

A boat could make the Pope swear.

Smilin-buddha said...

How do you work in the heat. Its 90 down here in PBC. I am not looking forward to next weekend at all. Demo time on the old back porch

Floridacracker said...

Smilin B,
I grew up in St. Aug with no A/C.

Thunder Dave said...

OMG the video is hillarious!
This weekend I'm going to try to post one from dinner the other night, it was a really cool place.

To increase your colorful vocabulary you could always hang aournd Lightnin. The Navy uses her to train the sailers how to cuss! ;-)

Anonymous said...

It is something to make wood do what you want it to. Just cut it twice and it's still to short! Trimming is an art, I miss doing that. So hang in there, I think you're doing just fine. I probably would'nt hire you, but, you would be fun to watch.
Bro J

Anonymous said...

I don't know what the *!@# that @#%&$*# Thunder is talking about, my mouth is just as @$%#&*%! clean as any one!

Miz S said...

I love the the little glimpses of your house. It looks so Florida-y.

Floridacracker said...

I noticed the link to her at the Navy website.

Bro J,
Now that's funny.

Apparently it's some kind of @##@#$@ smear campaign.

Miz S,
Thanks. Although these pics make me realize that restaining the house and porch boards is probably the next job.
Sigh ...

kevin said...

Yes, a boat could. I am highly skilled.