Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Falling For (more like due to ...) Bear


If you visit Pure Florida much, you know about my zany dog, "Bear".
He's a hundred pounds of thickly muscled sweetness with a wacky, playful, Labradattitude that keeps us constantly laughing.

Should you knock on our door, he will sound ferocious ... and look pretty scary too as he peers from the living room window at the knocker, his paws up on the windowsill, his breath fogging the window.

Big, ain't he? ... and SO strong!

He has his weaknesses, although he has just about kicked the yardbird habit. It's been months since anyone had to chase him around the yard while the live chicken in his mouth screamed for help.

He still wants to give chase, like a reformed smoker, who inhales a passing stranger's tobacco scent. He still wants it, but he's able to control the urge ... mostly.

I understand the urge to put chicken in your mouth ... I give in to that one pretty often.

Other Bear urges are harder to figure out ... like Tuesday night ...

Tuesday evening, the house was just a little chilly, and rather than bump up the heat, I grabbed a comforter blanket out of the laundry room and wrapped up in it while I watched the "Family Guy" marathon.
Bear knows he is not allowed up on the furniture and this is one rule he normally does not break ... unlike the "don't steal dirty clothes from the laundry and dive under the bed" rule, which he breaks constantly.

So, it was pretty odd when he kept trying to climb up in the chair with me. I would tell him NO, and push down on his massive head, but he only retreated for a moment before trying to ooze up into my lap again.

Dog furniture oozing is not unusual mind you, I'm pretty sure all Labs do this, but the point of THIS story is that Bear doesn't usually try and get up on any furniture.

Turns out, he's good at it though ...

First, a head resting on your leg.
Then a paw.
Then another paw ... followed by a massive chest and then umph! He's in your lap ... all 100 pounds of him.

Which I loved actually, but I was afraid Mrs. FC would walk in and demand to know why I was encouraging the dog to get on the furniture.

I already had my plea bargaining planned out ... " He's not really on the furniture, he's on this old blanket and it's on me, so he's not even touching the furniture."

Foolproof.

He was so persistent and it was so out of character for him. It had me pondering his reasoning as I tried to see over his giant head to the TV.
When I got up to grab some more ice tea (unsweetened of course) he hopped off, but immediately wanted up again when I returned.

I could not figure out what had gotten in to him, and then it hit me.

The comforter I had grabbed and wrapped around me was HIS comforter. Normally it lay across his bed in Junior's room, but it had just gone through the wash.

I was using HIS blanket.

Bear wanted his blankie and was determined to get it.

We go for a walk/run around the property every evening. This is normally fun, and not hazardous in any way. Normally ...

Last night, I was running later than usual and when I got home, Bear was more than ready for his walk. I clipped on the 25 foot leash we use for walks and we stepped out onto the porch. As I fiddled with the leash, trying to untangle a couple of loops, Bear dashed down the steps and was about ten feet away before I could yell, " No Bear, No!"

My left foot was raised, just about to step off the porch to the top step when Bear began stripping the coils of leash from my hand like a tarpon who just felt the hook.

I watched in just a little bit of horror as the last coil of leash went right around my left ankle and the leash went taught as Bear headed for the woods.

My legs jerked out from under me, I went horizontal for a moment, staring straight up into the sky, and then WHAM!

I slammed down to the ground, my butt on the pavement and the rest of my parts splayed across 3 rows of steps.

Ouch.

Bear came back immediately to see what I had found to roll in.


My elbows hurt, and my back hurt for the rest of the evening, but no sign of either today, so no harm done.



Bear apologized.

I told him it was no big deal.

Who could be mad at a face like that?

27 comments:

nfmgirl said...

Man, he looks massive in that last photo! What a guy! And what a face!

hee hee I love the vision of him sneaking into your lap. I have a cat that does that same type of "oozing". I'll keep shoving him away or even putting him on the floor, and he'll keep "oozing" into my lap until I finally give in and try to find a way to type with him between me and the keyboard on my laptop!

Doug Taron said...

Having witnessed the Bear/FC dynamic firsthand, I have to say that none of this surprises me. You two make a pretty good team.

Deb said...

Ah, life with a Lab. Sally just can't seem to understand that I don't like when she puts her paw up on my leg when I'm sitting in my rocking chair by the wood stove. And, if I try to sleep in on a weekend, she will "ooze" into bed with me. Labs. Gotta love 'em. :)

Sayre said...

My big dog, Revan, tries to sit in our laps. He's over a hundred pounds too, so there's no actual sneaking involved. And if he can't sit on us, he LEANS on us.

gainesville365 said...

I have Pugs. One of these has a girlfriend. She's red-and-black plaid, torn at the edges, smells horrendous, and sleeps with us in the bed. The other Pug pees on the girlfriend--it's quite kinky, really--and it's a wonder that I ever have overnight guests.

Caroline said...

I have a scar on my left ankle from a similar incident with a small schnauzer kid and a rabbit in the backyard and a tie-out chain. I am glad he isn't a 100 pounder, I'd have been plowing up the yard with my nose!

cndymkr / jean said...

110 lbs of pure love!

Ericka said...

glad you're okay!

awww, you stole his blankie. poor bear!

TheFrogBag said...

Oh no, a blanket thief! We gave in on the "no dogs on the furniture" rule. Camila is 50 lbs, but she thinks that is just right for sitting on laps.

Dani said...

Big Ouch!!! I'm so glad you didn't break anything. That would have been bad. ((hugs))

swamp4me said...

Sucker ;)

Felicia said...

Wow, that could have ended badly! Glad to hear you're okay. Good thing you and Bear are such good friends!

Anonymous said...

Ahh so sweet and brings back the memory of what Bear did on your leg last spring when we were there! Thought Thunder was gonna wet "his" pants! Say hi to the family!

cinbad122 said...

How many times do I have to say it?!?! I need a Bear fix. And as far as the furniture, it doesn't matter....he does it when no one is there! They all do. You should feel for the warm spot when you come home. It's either on the couch or one of the beds he is not allowed on! D's lab did that ALL the time.

Mark said...

One nice day I decided to sit on my front steps with my laptop in my lap, attached by electrical cord to make sure the charge was good. One of my late dobermans who was behind me decided to look at something in the yard a little closer. She raced past me, snagged the cord and jerked the laptop out of my lap and onto the sidewalk. And my laptop became my late laptop. Oh well.

Native Mom said...

I kinda miss the live chicken romps around the yard. Even though I'm a vegetarian, it's still funny to see those chickens play dead until he drops them, then they spring back to life and dash off.

threecollie said...

What a great dog! You know he loves you!

robin andrea said...

Bear does have a very soulful face. He speaks volumes with those eyes.

Thunder Dave said...

I prefer to think of that incident as a good imitation of some one walking across a lawn and getting caught in the automatic spprinklers!

And the Oscar for best imitation of a lawn sprinkler goes to: Bear

Nominee for best supporting actor: FC

kathy a. said...

ouch! glad you are OK.

i started some of the pepper seeds yesterday, in a tray of peat starters. saving the rest in case of mini-greenhouse failure; our son will be housesitting when we are away, and i'm not sure that he will pay much attention to the seeds. even though he wants to raise some datils.

Valerie said...

I love seeing pictures of him and hearing stories. I will be sad the day you change the masthead photo! It makes me happy everyday!

Anonymous said...

FC,

Blankie thief.

P

PS Glad you weren't hurt.

Miz S said...

Oh me oh my. Glad you're okay.

Family Guy, huh? Happy to hear you have at least one vice.

Robert V. Sobczak said...

That bear is a good dog, and well described ... plus, mystery solved.

Floridacracker said...

Nfmgirl,
LOL! If Bear got between me and the keyboard, I'd just have to go toss the ball with him!

Doug,
Dynamic duo ... thanks for spotting that rattler.

Deb,
I DO gotta love em! Sally rocks!

Sayre,
Those leans are very effective! Bear likes to lay on your feet so you know he's there.


Gainesville 365,
LOL! Sounds a little familiar...Bear has a different blankie that seems to be his girlfriend ...


Caroline,
I plowed up the ground last week out near the JEEP when he took off after a rabbit.


Jean,
He really is. He has all of us wrapped around his paw.

Ericka,
I know ignorance of the law is no excuse, but I didn't know it was his at the time. I plead innocent.


Frog,
LOL! Welcome to Pure Florida!! Big lap dogs are just fine in my book.

Dani,
Thanks! Don't worry, I'm unbreakable.

Swampy,
Nailed me. LOL!


Felicia,
Both of us need some retraining!

Lightnin,
But he was just a puppy! LOL!

Cindy,
He's blocked off with gates from any furniture when we are away. We are mostly smarter then him.
Maybe I can sneak him in on a teacher workday or something!


Mark,
Oh no! I worry about that here at the kitchen table as Bear walks over the cord constantly.




Native Mom,
It is funny, but exhausting. He is so fast and boneheaded when he has a chicken in his mouth.


ThreeCollie,
He has greatness potential :)

Robin,
I so agree. His eyes are so expressive.


Dave,
Yeah, if you sprinkle your lawn with URINE!

Kathy A,
I hope they sprout well ... I got about 60% germination so far on my first batch.

Valerie,
Oh no. How can I ever change it now? LOL! I understand though. He has that affect on me too.


Patio,
It was unintentional, I swear!

Miz S,
Family Guy is a vice? Thanks for noticing.

Robert,
He is a good guy. Loves the water too. You can relate to that!

Dani said...

What is it with the dirty clothes?! I swear Ollie lives for nabbing bras and underwear.

Cathy said...

I'd show these pixes to my husband, but he'd start crying.

What a dog.

I'm glad you didn't hurt him with that sudden stop ;-D